Des Photos de Toi
by ExquisiteVictory
Summary: Elsa is already close to losing her control. Anna asking her to be the matron of honor nearly sends Elsa over the edge. Elsa tries to lose herself in sex, drugs, and a relationship with a man that she could never love. She only wanted one person in her life, and that person left her there to drown. The worst part? The culprit acts like nothing ever happened between them. AU Elsanna
1. Chapter 1

**[I revised and added certain things to this chapter]**

Hello, this is an AU of Frozen. If you find any mistakes, please tell me!

Elsa's family is from France. There will be some French words in this story.

Translations:

(1)Fuck you or Go fuck yourself

Merde = shit

Conceal. Don't feel. Don't let them know =/= can't translate it the same without losing its original meaning. I had to change a few things, but it is roughly the same.

* * *

A kiss here and there, weaving in-between whispers of sweet nothings and innocent touches. She blushes, her cheeks nearly matching her hair.

Little did you know that I had my tongue in the same ear that you're talking sweetly into.

She giggles at something you say, stroking your muscular arm and leaning into you. You take advantage and stroke her wonderful flowing red locks. The same locks that you'll wake up to, scattered all over the pillows and hiding within your own hair.

_Va te faire foutre, Hans.(1)_

The back of my head is beginning to pound, and I can't hear anything they say anymore. I can only imagine smashing your head in, freezing the blood in your veins, and absolutely _shatter _you.

_Conceal. Don't feel. Don't let them know. _

I feel my mouth move into a smile. I pretend to be touched by their love. I pretend to be happy for their ever growing relationship. I pretend to not die a little inside everytime they touch. I slip away.

_The glass of water on the table freezes and shapes into a sharpen edge. _

I giggle along at the right moments. The sound so fake and hallow, even they can begin to tell. I'm beginning to lose control. Kristoff looks at me worriedly, his hand reaching for my own to comfort me. I shoot him a look and whispered to him, "I'm fine, just a headache." I felt guilty at his concern.

"I know you, Elsa. There's more to it than that," Kristoff whispers to me, his arm around my waist. "I know your mind isn't really here in the first place. You're acting weird."

Where would you know where my mind has gone, Kristoff? I didn't dignify it with a response. I couldn't. How can I explain to the man I've been with for years that I've never be _myself _with him?

Perfect little Hans starts recounting their first kiss.

I slip away again. This time it's to the past. Let the picture surface. It was of _us. _The seemingly two best friends, Elsa and Anna. Ice and fire. What they didn't know under that illusion of a platonic relationship was filled with nights of drunken kisses and passionate hands. What they didn't know under that illusion of Anna's innocence and _straightness_,was that she fucked me. In the literal sense and the metaphorical.

He's done now. I can tell by the way he finally glances our way, to the other seemingly perfect straight happy couple. How can we be less perfect? The man that works with ice is with an ice queen. He starts talking again.

_My hand reaches for it. I feel it in my hand. _

My head mechanically move up and down in a polite nod. I didn't even know what I was nodding to.

_I take it and shove the fucking thing down his throa-_

"So you agree, Elsa? To be my best woman? Well, matron of honor technically - but," Anna rambled, her hands moving rapidly with her words.

Usually I found her rambling cute and I would listen to her intently, patiently waiting for her to finish. Not this time. I lost her at _matron of honor. _

"Tu te maries?!" I blurted out without thinking. "I mean, you're getting married?" I could feel the surprise travel through my entire body, all part of me exploding in pain. That's it. She's moved on. It wasn't like I didn't know it was coming. Everything just didn't seem final until those words slipped out. I expected her to leave Hans. Fucked him and left him. I feel cold under my palms. My control is slipping. _Ah merde!_ I need to get out of here. Get away from _them. _

Kristoff glanced at me worriedly. Get away from _him. _

"Of course! Haven't you been listening?" Anna said, hurt. Your heart feels the prick of a thousand needles at her expression, her eyes drawn back, and mouth into a frown. "Hans proposed to me last week. I would of told you earlier if you had pick up my call...or if we didn't fell out of touch."

_You mean fell out of touching?_ Get away from _her. _

"Elsa, I really hope you accept. Kristoff is my best man," Han said. "I think you'll be great as the matron of honor. My mom is planning the wedding, so you won't have to feel stress about helping us plan the wedding."

I can't listen to this anymore. The underside of my hands are covered in frost and it's slowly spreading. _Merde. _

"I'm honored really! I don't zink I'm the right person for zee job," I said. It's getting worse. Even my accent is going crazy. "I guess I'll see you at ze wedding. Anyways, have a good evening. I'm sorry to cut this short but I got a headache and work in ze morning, à tout à l'heure."

I leave quickly, not letting them get a word in. I really wished they had chosen a different restaurant. One not so filled with people and chairs. It was hard to navigate through and find the exit when you're trying to stop seeing red and accidentally freeze everyone to death.

The glass door appears in front of me. I lunged for it and as soon as I reach fresh air, I breathe deeply, clearing my head of everything. I grabbed my cigarettes and light one quickly as I walk down the street.

Get away from _myself. _

I repeated the words in my head.

Conceal. Don't feel. Don't let them know.

_"Repeat it after me, Elsa," Father said. _

_I repeated the words. _

_"Cache toi. Sent rien. Laisse les pas savoir." _

"Elsa! Elsa! Please wait!" The voice shattering every illusion I had of control.

_Fuck._


	2. Souviens-toi s'en

Thanks everyone for the responses. If you spot any mistakes, please tell me!

* * *

[Flashback]

_"Elsa! Don't be afraid!"_

_"Anna, this is stupid. You know what'll happen to me if I get caught."_

_"We won't get caught! Don't you want to see the wonderful things you can do with your powers?"_

_Of course. I see it everyday. I see the disappointment in my parents' eyes, I see every mishap and misfortune I accomplish with my powers, and I see the fear within my servants' eyes. I don't even want to see what else I could accomplish with my wonderful fucking curse. But Anna, always Anna, has a way with me. She pokes the right buttons, turn the right knobs, and suddenly I'm a puppet with strings attached and she's pulling it._

_So here we are, dancing on a frozen pond in the middle of summer. Times like this makes me forget about my worries. I hear her laughter, I see the way the moonlight reflects off of her twinkling blue eyes, and I watch and watch as she spins almost uncontrollably on the pond._

_**Snap.**_

_(My mind took the picture, memorizing every detail)_

_Imagine this. Dark forest surrounds a frozen pond. The natural moonlight illuminates the pond, setting it like a stage for an actress or a dancer. I stand back, staring in awe as I watch Anna spin like a ballerina on this stage. Her wild hair spinning with her. She was like a tornado. No, she is a tornado. She tore through my life, tearing away the walls, and stripping me bare._

_She finally stops and turn to me._

_"See Elsa?" Anna says, panting and smiling. "Look how beautiful this is! Look how beautiful your powers are!"_

_I see how beautiful you are._

_"Yeah, I do."_

_**Snap.**_

_Bright blue eyes open, barely aware of their surroundings. The eyes belong to a smiling baby. Those eyes belong to me. I look down at the picture. Everytime I glanced at it, it always brings me to tears. I didn't know why. Was it because in that picture, my parents were so happily holding me or was it because those bright blue eyes were so innocent and naive?_

_I was a summer baby. Ironic, right? I guess you could say I was a winter baby depending on your definition of when winter was. On June 21st, snow had unexpectedly started falling. No one knew how to react to it except for the kids of course. Snow and ice only had one use to them: play. That afternoon, ten inches of snow already covering the land, I was born. They knew immediately what I was. A witch, a curse, or a monster depending on the day._

_I was confused growing up, always wondering why I was hated or why none of the servants will play with me. This world was filled with magic. I was taught that magic is an unlimited source of life, creation, and power. The only limit it had was the user wielding it. Anyone could learn magic, anyone could pick up a wand and cast spells, and anyone could use it. So why was my magic bad? Why was my magic forbidden? When I got older, I understood. My powers had no limit. It was tapped directly into the source and I could use it without channelling it through a medium. (A user's biggest weakness)_

_The adults knew that when I was a child, snow and ice had only one use to me; play. When I become an adult, snow and ice had only one use to me; power, unlimited raw power. I could cripple an entire ecosystem and I could send the world into a frozen hell. I was considered a witch. That meant I was discriminated against and oppressed under the law. Various other creatures faced the same issue - werewolves, nymphs, giants, half-bloods - and that meant we had to register ourselves to the government. Kept track, made sure we didn't use our powers ever, and we had restricted job choices. Our basic rights were practically none. Oppressed and beaten down by society, all of that in the name of order and peace. _

_My parents ensured that would never to their precious heir to Arendelle Magic Abuse Prevention. To them, I was nothing but a big embarrassment ready to happen. They had to control me, to make me forget about my power and lock it away. They hid me away from everyone except for their trusted servants. I was home schooled by various tutors to control my powers. I did everything they expected of me, and for a while, I was a normal child that they gave birth to._

_**Was.**_

_I bet they didn't expect a certain red head to come into my life and throw all of that through the window._

_**Snap.**_

_"Anna, what are you doing?"_

_"Shh!" Anna hissed, quickly covering my mouth. "Hold on, follow me to the pond first!"_

_I laughed softly at her running awkwardly, trying to hide something under her dress while trying to modestly cover herself. I couldn't help but follow. That's what I seem to always be doing. Forever chasing after Anna._

_We reached our pond. Anna grabbed my hand and quickly dragged me behind a tree. I could vaguely make out what she was hiding. They looked like... Bottles?_

_"What are you hiding?" I asked._

_"Do you trust me?"_

_"Of course."_

_"Drink this."_

_I took a sip._

_"It's soda," I frowned._

_"With a splash of vodka," Anna grinned. "Drink more!_

_"Ann-" Anna cutting me off from protesting._

_"No! You need to relax. We're going to have fun today, and you're gonna let it go."_

_I smiled, "Well, are you going to get me another one then?"_

_Every sip I could feel myself letting go. We talked, laughed, and drunkenly stumbled together in an awkward dance to only a song we could hear and feel. I felt so free, each touch sending my spirits higher and higher._

_"Elsa, you're my best friend," Anna declared. "I love you sooo much!"_

_Then she kissed me. At first, I was frozen. It was a friendly kiss. Anna paused, pulling backwards, placing her head against mine and staring lustfully into my eyes. I moaned. She pushed me backwards and kissed me again. This time deeper and deeper until my knees couldn't handle it anymore and we collapsed on top of eachother. Snow started falling at the same time. _

_More nights happened and more drunken kisses were exchanged. I never dared cross the line to anything more than that despite falling harder and harder for her. I didn't want to risk losing what I had with her and I didn't think I was strong enough to withstand her rejection. I had thought that Anna simply enjoyed helping me let loose, but soon I realized it was as much of a thrill to her. She loved sneaking in bottles after bottles of different drinks, and she loved kissing me. We never did anything more than making out. Until that night that is._

_**Snap.**_

_I was late. Usually I'll get my homework done before meeting up Anna at the pond, but a professor had stopped me and wasted an hour of time lecturing me. When I got there, Anna had already started. She was drunk. The moment she spotted me, she pushed me up against the tree, her hand down my skirt, exploring my thighs. I gasped, I felt like I should of stopped her, but Anna was a tornado. She tore down my walls, my boundaries, and took what she wanted. I was helpless to stop her and even if I could, I don't think I could stop myself. That night, she took me._

_**Snap.**_

_The few weeks after that, nothing had changed. It was as if the night never happened and I felt relieved. I didn't want anything to change. We still had our girls night, though they never went as far. Nor were they as often. Rumor has it that she was meeting up with a boy named Hans. Later, it was confirmed they were dating._

_I was her best friend. What we shared was drunken and stupid, near the lines of, "Did we really do that last night? I don't even remember! Haha!" Even so, I was hurt. She didn't mention him, not even to her best friend and I was blind-sided by it. She would spend time with him in the day, and spend the night with me. Until she stopped completely, opting to spend time with him. At that point, I couldn't stand to be around her anymore. I couldn't be around them. Now, she's getting married and I'm with Kristoff. _

_Fucked me and left me. If only Hans knew where those lips he kissed has been._

**_Snap._**

[Present]

_God, Anna please. Just stop. _Sadly, there's no escape, no door to disappear into or corners to hide behind. I took one last breath and turned to face her.

"Oui?" I said, politely.

Anna stopped, panting slightly.

"What was that?" She asked, her blue eyes revealing her puzzlement. Like there's reason for me to turn down her offer. "Why did you turn me down and left the place like it was burning?"

Was there really no reason you could think of, Anna?

"Look, I don't give a fuck about your wedding, Anna. You're happy, great. Congratulations! You got the perfect man waiting for you back there. You might wanna go back to him because I'm not sticking around."

"Why are you acting like this?" Anna asked, flustered. "What the hell did I do to deserve this? Is it because you don't approve of Hans?"

"No, this isn't about fucking Hans!" I yelled. Not waiting for her response, I turn leave.

"Then _what?" _She growled back at me, her nails biting into the skin of my arm.

"Oh really? Like you don't fucking kno-"

"Of course I fucking don't! You never tel-"

My entire body was shaking in angry, pent up energy building up. I knew I was about to snap and I did the only thing I knew how to release it.

I pulled her toward me and smashed my lips against hers.

I feel her moan melt against my own and her lips move in response.

_"Remember now?"_


End file.
